the ZOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I tried to post this the other day; but blogger wasn't having it! Here are some pics from my trip to the SD zoo with G's fam!

Not sure I agree with the first sentence! :-)

It was a great time!

Texas

Can't find this too many places! Pluckers is rivaling BW3!
Oh Stan Schleuter, how I love you
Ray teaching tap
They made Fusion cupcakes!!
The famous fried pickles! They actually were amazing!

We had a great time as always in Killeen.

We'll be back soon!

nebraska

Once again a great week! Future stars up above!

Homecoming

I got a beautiful surprise when I came home a couple of weeks ago from KY/NE. That was my amazing boyfriend coming into the airport to pick me up and surprising me with the rose up above. Thanks babe for brightening my day and my life!

Self-Worth VS Work-Worth

IS THERE A DIFFERENCE??

I have to say that I keep thinking that as I get older things will settle down . . . somehow I just keep getting new adventures and new points of view.

I've been having an issue of self-worth. What am I actually worth?

Well, let me clarify that I have that issue mainly with work. Thus the title, work worth. (yes, came to this conclusion without outside help) As a human being, I know that I have self worth because of my dear friends, family and those who truly love me who keep reminding me that I have much to offer. They pick me up when I am down in ways that I often find surprising. In amazing ways, I mean that the friends I've had for life, you oldies know who you are. . .are the ones who are true to me. You haven' t given up on me and you've relied on our past to know that I am still me, even if I seem absent.

My life since I graduated college has been based on work. How to get where I'm going. I've gone, gone, gone, gone, gone. . .And, recently I've hit some pot holes. I guess that's putting it lightly. And it just keeps keeping on. The potholes seem to have turned into bridges that don't exist anymore. People don't want what I have to offer them. And that hurts. It's personal. It's unlike any other type of rejection I've ever experienced, because it's my life's work. What I've sacrificed so so so much for (gladly at the time). Over the past year, that has vanished, it's not appreciated, it's not the favorable choice, for whatever reason, regardless of discipline (b/c you all know I teach everything - well not hip hop, I am the whitest person I know). It's been slow and steady but it's all seemingly coming to a head.

One time I had a director of mine say to me about me, "Dance is who you are. It's what you do." Well that was true for a long time, but it's not ALL of who I am. And I know that. I really do. However, at the end of the day when you aren't wanted it still hurts. Kind of brings you back to being a kid and not being accepted at school with the cool kids. And I didn't think that I would feel that rejection in such a powerful way at my age - - and especially after I've overcome so many career related obstacles thus far with such bouyancy. But I do.

I know I have to figure a way out of this maze, but it might just be a path not yet taken. I don't want to live my life anymore based upon my job. There is too much living to do that I've been missing out on. My other side of myself has been neglected. I don't want to only have my career to live for. There are so so so so many more important things out there. At the end of my life, what will REALLY be important?

I know what that will be to me, and I need to start focusing on it.

We are going to try one more time!

STILL TRAVELING!

and still trying to post this blog. . .

this is the third attempt and if i push send and it doesn't work. . .i guess you won't see this message or these photos! :-)

Thank God for FAMILY! We stayed with Dave and Lisa in KY last week and it was great. So so so appreciative. We were in luxury to have a "home" to come home to. To be able to eat there (not go out) and have our own rooms! WOW!

Some of the highlights below. Our visits were mainly in the late evening b/c we all worked so late, but I was grateful for the time we had.

L was being adventurous. . .wanted to do shots! Ray volunteered to participate. . .
Cheers!
Eeww. . .what did I just do?
Trivia on the WIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!! Really hard, and they cheat at that house :-)
D's Bday with Alex and L -- SUSHI! The best. . .
L's FIRST saki Bomb -- I was shocked! We had a tutorial.
Drunk in the walk in beer cooler at the gas station.
Tres Amigos
The REASON for the trip! They were amazing and we had a great week! Almost 70 people there! It was good to be back.